AC/DC taught us that it’s a long way to the top if you wanna rock and roll, but Noel Gallagher (of Oasis) reminded us Sunday night that rock stars can never stop watching their backs.

No, literally, don’t get comfortable, because the first time you do, a crazy Canadian might come roaring from behind and knock you into the speakers. They don’t teach you about that in the School of Rock, but Noel got a (suspected) fractured rib and ligament damage after a Virgin Festival Toronto festival-goer, high on music and god knows what else, decided to interrupt perennial Oasis classic Morning Glory and violently shove Noel.

Thanks to the same glorious site bringing you car crashes and animal carnage since 2005, the attack can be witnessed in all its pain, (skip to the 1:30 mark).

If the uncontrollable desire to laugh becomes too strong for your cynical jaded body to control, direct your mirth and derision at the faux-anger and posturing exhibited by long-time louse Liam. After fearfully backing away from the initial attack, Liam realizes that this guy has just hit his brother and that he should probably act angry. Once the assailant is sufficiently subdued, Liam waits until there’s enough roadies to restrain his own rage and then pretends to go after the deranged bloke.

“Let me at him, seriously guys, I’ll kill him, I’ll murder him with this oh so fashionable and dashing woman’s scarf I insist on wearing … I’m tough, I swear…”

Our condolences go out to Noel, and it is worth noting that, though obviously in pain, Noel and the rest of Oasis did come back out and finish the set. That’s true rock and roll.

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Nathan Martin

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