My little midwest alma mater, Hillsdale College, is now famous, unhappily, for animal cruelty and college journalism feuds! Here's the story that has piqued the interest of the Associated Press, the USA Today, Deadspin, the Boston Globe, the Detroit Free Press. Apparently the baseball team lost 9 out of 10 games and the Hillsdale Collegianaddressed the issue in an editorial:

We like baseball, but we hate this baseball.

You've gone under our radar for years now, but this past week did you in. Nine games. Nine. You've lost nine games of your past 10. But the sad thing is this doesn't cover the half of it. …

Lose the swagger. Most of you walk around campus with this chip-on-my-shoulder, badass tempo. How is this possible? It's not enough for you to simply lumber around like the other disappointing athletes? Lose the stride boys.

Damn, that's mean! The Collegian apologized, but someone (allegedly the baseball team) went ahead and dumped a lot of roadkill, including an apparently murdered goat, on the front porch of a Collegian editor who wears cute, nerdy glasses, whose front porch is also the front porch of my sister's boyfriend's brother (so I am very closely connected here). The best line is from the Free Press: "It is unclear where someone would get so many animal carcasses." Ha.

My confidential source tells me the baseball team is by no means the most arrogant sports team on campus. Apparently the basketball team is most arrogant, then the football team, and only after that the baseball team. My confidential source also tells me that, like all college newspapers, the Hillsdale Collegian is stuck-up and purposely inflammatory. It seems at least this editorial was. 

The flap has prompted the usual self-righteous outrage. I was just tagged in a Facebook note making it clear that Hillsdale will pay for this: 

While I admit Hillsdale helped me get to law school, in my mind the diploma I received from that morally deprived place is nothing better than toilet paper. The administration's brushing off of the animal cruelty and mutilation case on their own campus shows that the virtues the place preaches are a joke. Nobody stands for virtue when they protect those who commit felonies under Michigan law.

From this day forward, I refuse to visit the college ever again. I love Hillsdale. It is a nice rural town, but I will never cross that campus again. I can never support a place that believes felons should walk among their decent classmates. Most certainly, I will never give a dime to the college. None of my wealth will ever go to such a place. I could have billions and I would not give a dime even if it meant the college would go bankrupt.

Good thing most of us Hillsdale grads are impoverished liberal arts majors and will never have billions to withhold.

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Alisa Harris

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