Okay, stop snickering.

You could almost hear the few thousand rock purists (the few who didn’t trash Rolling Stone long ago) groaning and burning their copies of the August 2008 issue. The issue that, yes, devoted its cover story to a praying, God-fearing, (supposedly) premarital-sex-abstaining boy band. What’s more, the piece laid off the magazine’s famous anti-Christian bile, coming nigh to actually fawning over the Jonas Brothers, not to mention giving their new album a rather astonishing four stars. And I guess the old time rock-‘n-rollers have a point: if rock and roll was already dead, then, well, it’s a whole lot dead-er now.

Jonas Brothers
A Little Bit Longer
Rating: 5.7/10
Hollywood Records, 2008

The Jonas Brothers have been bashed for just about everything. The whole purity ring thing, and the endless hooplah about it, is silly. (True.) “S.O.S.” just sucks. (Also true. Well, kind of.) They only pretend to be rock stars, what with those showy guitars and those garish clothes and those screaming girls. (True, because of course we all know 17-year-olds can’t really play instruments). But in the olden days, those things meant you were a rock star, even if your band was iffy and every song sounded pretty much the same. I’m guessing guys like ZZ Top, were they aware of the Jonas Brothers, might not find them so insufferable, or be so absolutely certain they’re skin-deep show-offs. It’s only my generation, the current arbiter of taste, that suffers debilitating allergy attacks when exposed to good old rock glamour. Dead? Psh.

Consider “Shelf,” the first track to really hold the attention in more than “wow, this is fast and catchy” sort of way: Joe’s ripping riff pairs with Nick’s thunderous strumming, an assured glam-rock romp a la The Black Parade, and it’s just as good. Of course, the song is about how hearts don’t belong on shelves, but hey, the principal songwriter is fifteen. “Lovebug,” a plunking ditty about, well, guess, is probably the best song the brothers have ever released: it lives in its own skin—perfect comic timing, puffs of smooth harmonies, listless riffing, and a final minute of double-guitar rocking out. “Tonight” rocks even harder, showing off every angle of Jonas singing chops (something they have no problem duplicating onstage).

That’s not to say an entire forty minutes of this is worth its playing time, especially if you’re older than like, sixteen. But what’s worth noting is how little the Jonas Brothers are like their age-classified compadres who have earned similar criticisms: they are neither lily-livered players or guitar-strumming crybabies who invite the world into their musical therapy sessions. The result of a musical gang-bang involving N*Sync and the All-American Rejects they may be, but they got the best genes of the bunch: the rock, the catchy, the singing, and the looks.

So for now, go ahead. Skip this one. But when the Disney days are over, as even the Jonases know they will be, these boys will have a good five to ten years of rock experience and recognition enough to go wherever and play whatever they want. Dismiss them at your own risk.